Joy to Spare

I guess so many people learned in 7th grade English not to use cliches, but still really wanted to use cliches, that they got ahold of the word "proverbial" and had a party all over all of the books. I normally don't have a problem with non-wrong things in other people's writing. Wrong things like "I could care less" and "tied there shoes" are distracting. "She spilled the proverbial beans" is not wrong, but isn't it really just prolonging the cliche by smashing an excuse-me-but-I-must-use-this-cliche-but-I'm-using-the-word-proverbial-so-you-see-I'm-acknowledging-it's-a-cliche-so-it's-okay extra word into it? If you want to use a cliche, please just use it proudly without adding that pompous extra word to it. If you can't, good! Think of a better way to express your point.

Leftovers get a bad rap. I keep seeing/hearing people bashing leftovers, e.g. "Our family has been battling colds, so we've been eating a lot of leftovers." My first question is, what else would you do with them, throw them in the garbage or feed them to the dog? The second thing I wonder is, how do all these people have the time and energy to make a new dinner every night? Leftovers in my house are the majority of what we eat. Here, we just call them "food." I love food. I really enjoy all kinds of foods from different cultures, prepared in interesting ways. I even enjoy cooking. What I don't appreciate is coming to the end of a long day and having to think of something to cook, using what I have in my fridge and pantry, maybe find a recipe(s), and dirty many pots and pans to create these dishes, all while my oldest son comes in every three and a half minutes to tell me he's hungry. So I don't. I know lots of folks find or create meal plans, w...

What did we do today? I got up and did my coffee/bible/devotional time (Oswald Chambers--deep stuff!) and prayed for my family. The boys came out and did their "first things" too. They take a shower if it's their day, get dressed, feed the dog, drink water, and read their bibles. Big bro wrote a prayer/poem of thanks in his prayer journal (This is not a usual occurrence!) while Little Bro did his math workbook. After that, they began their day with Legos as usual. Big bro is really into Shakespeare right now, so lots of his current Lego play revolves around that. He constructed a scene from MacBeth. I got him a set of kid-version books of all the plays, which he's been enjoying. We had breakfast--eggs with butter, onions and green peppers, and a smoothie with lettuce, blueberries, spinach/banana, yogurt, and blood oranges. I read from our One-Year Bible, and the Window on the World page about Vietnam. Then, I read from the Peter the Great book we're reading ...

Having burnt out a little with "school at home" as our method of learning, the past couple weeks we've been doing "life" instead. The boys and I all learn so much more and are so much happier when we follow our own interests. I thought I'd start recording some of the things we do each day during this relaxed learning phase, with artificially separated academic subject areas highlighted so I realize how much"school" we're actually doing and learning even when we're not "doing school." So here's today: - All four of us read the bible at breakfast - the boys read Psalms and Proverbs, Daddy and I read Matthew. History, Character, Geography, Reading. - Spoke a little Spanish to each other throughout the day. Spanish - Little Bro wrote a(n other) letter to Santa--getting an early start-- and learned to spell "anything" "stocking," and a couple other words he asked me how to spell.  Spelling, Writing, Hand...

3 years later... We just finished All About Spelling, level 2. For review, I made up sentences that use all the words they learned in this level, plus a few other words I've taught them, like "-ould," "their," "what, when, where," etc. and some "-ly" words.  I grouped them by our remaining school weeks, 3 sentences a day.   I prefer sentence dictation rather than simply writing lists of words. It improves spelling retention, plus they review capitalization and punctuation at the same time. Efficient! Leaves time for their own pursuits.  Here they are in case anyone else can benefit from them. Most are not great sentences. Some are really weird, untrue, borderline inappropriate... It's harder than I expected to craft good, short sentences from a word list! week 1 Buzz spills all six drinks on Mike. The garden queen uses a hose to water a rose bush. Keep careful count of those many broken cords. The girl’s quill pen races...

Well, two years later, we are still doing toy stores in the front yard. This kid loves to make money. He drags Little Bro out on the Fourth of July to sit behind a wagon full of toys with masking tape price tags. They sit for hours. Our wonderful neighbors come by and make a donation or a purchase.  Big Bro wants to pull the wagon around the neighborhood, but I draw the line. Even though he's only eight, a permit must need to be involved at some point. I see big business in his future!  Sometimes Little Bro sells his pictures or paper boats. I secretly dream that the boys will be entrepreneurs together, Little Bro as the creative head and Big Bro as the businessman.  But then I also dream that Big Bro's passion for justice, creative problem solving ability, and persistence will serve him as an attorney working for social justice. And Little Bro's love for people and art could serve him so well as a life events photographer. Calm down, Mommy. Stop planning, and pra...

Two days ago Little Bro asked to do some reading, and I was surprised that he can now blend sounds together, i.e. read! A month or so ago, he couldn't. We were all so excited! Now it's my job to just keep calm and let him read when he's interested so it remains enjoyable and exciting for him. Yesterday I had Big Bro (Kindergarten) do a project of his choosing (no suggestions from me). He chose to open a toy store on the front lawn. Here were the observable things he learned about: -Character/values: You don't sell your brother's toys without asking first or sharing the profits. -Spelling: He made a sign: "Toy Stor". I had him add an "e" (Who's gonna make that "o" say its name?). -Art: He needed more "contrast" on his sign, so he went over the pencil with colorful marker. -Pricing/value: $9 is too much to charge for a used whistle; $1 is (a little) more appropriate. -Vocabulary: "Grand Openi...

Raising Godly Tomatoes (L. Elizabeth Krueger) - VERY PRACTICAL This lady runs a tight ship. I have tried applying it all, word for word, and it doesn't work with our family dynamic. But the biblical principles behind the way she does things are solid, and many of her ideas and techniques are very helpful. The name comes from her principle of "tomato staking" - don't let your little tomatoes grow wild across the ground where they break and rot and get nibbled by pests. Stake them up where they can grow well, prune them, water and fertilize them regularly. Love your children - same principles as "How to Really Love Your Child" Have age-appropriate, but high expectations for your children. Keep your children within sight and/or earshot all of the time so you can nip wrong behavior/attitudes in the bud and they don't become habits. (I have tried this. It is exhausting, but effective.) Keep your children/family separate from the world so that they adopt your ...

Little Bro is learning to to put on undies all by himself. (Mommy: Baby, they're backwards, you gotta turn them around.) Little Bro turns himself around 180 degrees and tries again. :) Big Bro, to Little Bro while doing acrobatics on the bed: "Whoa, how'd you get those neat-looking skills?" A year ago, Big Bro: "Christmas is my favorite year of the month."

Hints on Child Training (Clay Trumbull, written in 1891) I highly recommend this one! Here's what I can remember and thought was helpful: Do not yell, threaten, nag, whine, or even scold. Ever. Use a gentle voice, always. Control yourself. (Wow. Easier said than done, but great advice. The other day, I found myself begging Little Bro not to wet his pants anymore. I'll bet you can guess how effective that was!) Do not allow your child to win with "teasing," meaning whining or begging. Even if it's something you want to do for them or were planning to, never give them something after they've whined for it. Whining will stop when it stops working. Giving children everything they want is a really bad idea. Also, if you ARE going to let them have something, let them want it for a while BEFORE giving it to them or helping them save up for it (i.e. a bicycle, guitar, car) so they actually appreciate it. Practical ideas for making special days (like Christmas and the ...

I started to write my next parenting book review and ended up on this tangent. It's long enough in itself. My next book (Hints on Child Training, by H. Clay Trumbull) has a chapter on Training a Child to Self-control: such as, if he gets hurt, don't let him scream and cry as long as he wants. This seems to go directly against the popular fear of suppressing emotions, but children desperately need to be helped to control (not suppress) their emotions and reactions. And here is the tangent. Children need to be helped to view life in a way that helps them to have more "correct" emotional reactions. A couple days ago, I realized I have to pay $340 for a traffic ticket I got for turning left onto a quiet street because supposedly there is a tiny sign that I never saw saying I couldn't turn left there between 8:15 and 8:25 a.m. or some such nonsense. And I did feel angry. For a minute. Maybe a little longer. Maybe every time I allow myself to dwell on it. $340? For a si...

I've read LOTS of parenting books. Some are conceptual (what, why). Some are practical (how). Most are a mix. Most books have some ideas that are helpful to me and some ideas that are not. A lot of it depends on the parent, the child, and the dynamic between them. Here's the first of my favorites (more to follow): How to Really Love Your Child (Ross Campbell, M.D.) This book helps build a solid, loving foundation in your relationship with your child. We all love our children, but don't always understand how to show our love in a way they can perceive. Children perceive love in these ways: Physical touch. Hugs. Wrestling. Patting their arm. Tousling their hair. Eye contact when talking or listening to them. Focused attention. Spend time interacting with them as often as possible. Discipline them consistently. (Discipline is not the same as punishment. It means teaching, training. Punishment should be only a small part of discipline, or even not at all.)

After dinner. Grandma resting on Grandma's lap, Grandpa stroking Grandma's arm. Duncan: "Grandpa's softing Grandma!" Love it.

I had heard people say that having a child renews your sense of wonder. The way she watches a single ant for twenty minutes. His excitement at seeing an elephant in the clouds. But I hadn't anticipated all that giving way to the most euphoric sense of awe at what the Lord not only can make, but spent the first half of eternity making for His children. To show His love for us. To communicate His invisible existence. I used to dread spiders. Loathe them. Lose sleep over them. They still freak me out, but now when I see one of those strange creatures, I hope it's not the kind I have to kill. Even the brown widow spider praises her Creator with her grace and beauty as she glides down to the ground before I smack her with a sandal. (I'd leave her alone on a hike, but on my kids' fort, she's toast.) I've always seen rainbows and thought, how beautiful. But now I see in them God's promise. Yes, not to flood the entire earth again, but more than that. All His prom...

(about a year ago) Big Bro: If we went too fast, the policeman would knock us over. (yesterday, talking to Mommy) Big Bro: I really like your singing, but would you keep reading now, please? (He's a master of tact. Must have gotten it from Daddy, cause I know it didn't come from me!)

I just visited this old blog and realized that I really miss writing! So many changes since my blogging sabbatical. New house, fine art career begun, bigger kids, healthy husband, and finally... actually... not quite officially, but definitely... gearing up for homeschool. F irst course: Swimming! Bought the DVD ( Waterproof kids . I recommend it!), bought the book, buying the 10-visit pass at the community pool. Let's see how we do. Favorite quotes of late: -I treasure those little things Big Bro still doesn't get quite right: "erfquick" (earthquake), "I've never had that in a long, long time ago." (I haven't had that for a long time.) -Mommy: "Big Bro, please don't touch the books. You have pasta sauce all over your hands, and we don't want your bible to get all yucky." Big Bro: "Yeah, cause then we'd have to look at dirty pictures of Jesus and the disciples." (No joke. Word for word.) -Big Bro is becomin...

Over a month has passed since my last post, and I'm afraid it might be even longer until my next. I'm not one to overbook myself... other valuable things have become forefront for now, leaving me no extra time to blog. Until next time...

My life right now is a dramatization of that old poem Footprints. The one in which we see our lives as two sets of footprints (ours and God's), but only one set during the hard times - when God carries us. I am being carried now... going for a ride on His broad shoulders. I truly do not think Daddy could have handled another postponement of his transplant, nor another single dialysis session, and God allows us to endure only that for which he's given us the strength. Now it is my turn to be tested. Sick toddler, ailing husband, mango rash*, daily headaches, extra vigilant cleaning & food prep. I mention all this not to cast a line for sympathy but to give glory to God for sustaining me with the kind of joy and peace that comes only from the Maker of heaven and earth. I have, by grace alone, been mostly patient and even-tempered with the boys through it all. It was an incredible blessing to have someone come and clean the house yesterday and will continue to be wonderful for...

Coming home from long trips to the hospital has proved a joyful event. I got a taste of this when, as I recalled in a previous post, Daddy and I returned from a weekend away. Big Bro had actually missed me, hugging and kissing me of his own accord. What new joy I felt! Tonight as the little fuzz-head and I crossed the living room together on our way down for bathtime, I tousled his hair and spoke loving words. Big Bro, in turn, reached over and rubbed my knee. "I have to rub your leg," he said, looking up at me, "because I'm too little to reach your head." His sweet, simple affection is still new, still melts my heart. May I never take it for granted.

Big day today. Daddy now has 3 kidneys. One works great. I am exhausted. I am going to bed. At 9:15. No dialysis. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!